In my previous article “7 Beliefs that are Killing Your Business” we explored the beliefs that stand in the way of taking the first steps in order to achieve big goals. Now , I want to talk about the 10 Most common signs you can recognize that you are about to bail on your goals. Goal achievement can be challenging. Sometimes you really need to knuckle down and bring home the win. However, your behavior might start to change as if you are not your normal goal-butt-kicking self, and you take on one of these 10 roles. That may be a sign you are looking for an escape route. When we can recognize old habits early we can course-correct and achieve our goal before failure sets in. Curious if you have taken on any of these 10 self-defeating roles? Take a peek and see if any of these roles sound familiar.
“My Way or the Highway” Melissa – Do you find yourself repeating old patterns with the same old problems never going away? These are the tell tale signs of “My Way or the Highway” Melissa , attacking the same old problems with what you repeatedly think is the best solution. Tip: When a problem is repeating, it’s time to question your logic, and try a new path to solving the problem.
Denial Denny – Nothing good comes without sacrifice, and it’s at the moments of sacrifice that “Denial Denny” rears his ugly head. He’s the little devil sitting on your shoulder telling you to give up because all of this work is not worth it… because “It wasn’t so bad before” and “that was a long time ago”. If this happens trust that “it was that bad” or you would not have embarked on your goals in the first place. Stick to your guns!
Isolation Ike –Do you feel yourself pulling away from others, especially the people that would be likely to offer a corrective view? Or possibly acting overly defensive isolating or defensive. This could be a sign that you are about to give up on your goals. Seek to be around people who will support your goals and give you a sense of accountability.
Crisis Chris – Have you ever felt like the world is conspiring against you? Or that a perfect storm is a brewing, and you have no choice but to baton down the hatches, go into survival mode, and abandon your important goals? I would expect everyone feels like this from time to time, but generally a good night’s sleep will keep you from acting on this impulse. If you are living in the crisis zone day after day then you may have taken on the role of Crisis Chris, and you may want to consider the deeper reasons why you are in crisis all of the time. Do these crisis give you a green light to lower the bar? Remember, you set your goals for things that are truly important to you, and you deserve to achieve them!
Stuck Stacey – Immobilization is the name of the game for Stuck Stacey. He/She can’t get motived to get organized, get moving or thinking, or get daily tasks done, let alone achieve anything bigger. Stuck Stacey is paralyzed, and not moving towards his/her target goal.
Overreaction Olivia– Getting emotional? Getting upset over stupid little things? Feeling like nothing you do is right? You may be suffering from Overreaction Olivia, overreacting to small things, and distorting and confusing how important (or non-important) the barriers to achieving your goals are. Overreaction is simply that…an over reaction, which means energy is being wasted, and decreasing your ability to complete your goals. Take a deep breath, come down to earth and get grounded about the real size of the challenges you face.
Depressed Dylan – When things get tough Depressed Dylan appears. Melancholy and low self-esteem creep in, and the energy to get things done is sucked right out of you. Obviously, real medical depression is going to require more medical intervention than a mindset to overcome, but if you find yourself seeping into depression and want to get back on the “getter –done” track, try to set up easy routines for you to follow to keep things moving. When you open something, close it. Drop something, pick it up. Accomplishing small tasks will give you small victories all day long, and keep yo u from mounting a pile of disarray that has to be tackled later.
Overwhelmed Oscar – If you feel like you have chronic low energy, you are getting sick more frequently, you feel inefficient, and you can’t seem to recharge you may be experiencing overwhelm. For many, overwhelm happens just before you give up on your goals because of the feeling of loss of control. When Overwhelmed Oscar takes hold set yourself back on course by first getting it all out of your head. Write everything down (on paper or a spreadsheet) that is overwhelming you. Next, assign priorities, delegate, eliminate and delay items on your list. Your list becomes a plan that feels far more workable. The faster you can get back on track, the sooner you can get back to achieving your goals.
“I Deserve a Break” Denise – Achieving goals is hard! Whether you are trying to lose weight, build a savings account, or implement systems in your business, there are going to be moments when falling off the wagon and indulging some comfort seem so attractive. You may tell yourself “I deserve it.” I am going to sleep in for the 10th day in a row because I deserve it.” Well, before you self-sabotage any more tell yourself “yes you do deserve it!” But what you really deserve is to achieve major goals that you have decided are important, and much longer lasting than a momentary instant gratification.
Blaming Becky –You did not make your sales goal this week and you are angry at your employees for their petty annoyances and distractions that kept you from achieving your goal. The employees did actually take up your time with things they could have handled themselves, but by blaming others for your goal shortfall you are focusing your attention on something/someone that is out of your control, and change cannot happen that way. In order to go over, under or around obstacles to achieve your goals you have to know you can’t control what others do, but you can control how you react or manage those distractions.
When you see yourself falling into any of these roles diffuse the situation, and remind yourself of why you set your goals in the first place. Seek out help with accountability; this is a great time to connect with a business coach who is experienced in helping your keep your eyes on the prize, and overcoming self-sabotaging habits.